There are some things that CANNOT be changed by just talking about them or by using willpower and positive thinking!
- Being neglected and/or abused in any way as a child and/or as an adult.
- Being in at least one accident of any kind.
- Being subjected to any kind of violence by other people or animals.
- Being in a fire, tornado. hurricane, flood, armed combat.
- Having surgery or some other invasive medical procedure.
- Witnessing any kind of violence.
- Witnessing the aftermath of natural or human-caused violence.
- Witnessing something very frightening or disturbing, even on TV or the Internet.
- Losing one or more important relationships abruptly because of a breakup, relocation, illness, or death.
- Being bullied or intimidated regularly at any part of your life.
- Being a helping professional who regularly listens to others talk about the terrible things that happened to them.
Copyright Alice Clark
It's all connected.
Trying to cope with memories and physiological effects of traumatic events like these often results in:
- Mood swings or depression.
- Panic attacks or anxiety.
- Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
- A sense of helplessness that chips away at confidence and self-esteem.
- Problems with sleep, possibly with nightmares or other disturbing dreams.
- Difficulty with focus or concentration.
- Irritability, anger, rage, for no apparent reason.
- Being startled easily, sometimes more than the situation calls for.
- Feeling unsafe and needing to check surroundings often.
- Being disturbed by sense cues, such as odors, sounds, tastes, being in certain locations, being touched.
- Feelings of not quite being in your body.
- Re-experiencing all or parts of the event as if it was happening in the present.
- Feeling guilty and responsible for what happened.
- Feeling ashamed that it happened, that you're damaged, and that you can't "just get over it".
- Feeling disconnected from spiritual beliefs.
- Feeling unable to be fully present for loved ones.
- Feeling disinterested in things you usually enjoy.
- Self-medicating with chemicals or behaviors, such as over-shopping, sex, gambling, computer games, to try to distract yourself for a little while or induce pleasurable states.
"What does this have to do with me?"
Read on ...
Where were you the morning of September 11, 2001? Do you remember seeing on TV, again and again, the incomprehensible scenes of that morning? Do you remember what it felt like to witness such an event, even from a distance? Horror, disbelief, racing heart, a sense of unreality, a clenching in your gut. Perhaps you dreamed of it, or had trouble sleeping for thinking about it and what it might mean to your own personal security, the security of the nation. Perhaps you knew people who were in the buildings or on those flights, and you spent agonizing hours waiting to learn whether or not they survived.
Depending on our personal past, witnessing this event disturbed us to different degrees, but no one remained untouched emotionally. This was a dramatic example of how a traumatic event affects peoples’ lives, from close up and from far away. There are so many of these events portrayed on daily news that, in many ways, our nervous systems are constantly in a highly aroused state.
A traumatic event creates a biological sequence in all animals originating in the most primitive aspect of the nervous system in humans that many are familiar with: the fight, flight, or freeze response. In less than an instant, when danger is perceived, the body prepares to engage the danger in a either a fight for life or a flight from peril. All of this is beyond the control of the rational mind because if the body had to count on thinking, it might die. In this area, the body is much more intelligent than the highly valued neo-cortex, the rational, executive part of the brain!
In his book, Waking the Tiger (1997, California, North Atlantic Books) Peter Levine PhD states: “… the intense, frozen energy, instead of discharging, gets bound up with the overwhelming, highly activated, emotional states of terror, rage, and helplessness” (p. 100). All of this frozen material results in a variety of uncomfortable symptoms and behaviors that often change over time, sometimes resulting in medical conditions. This is a trauma response. There is presently a great deal of research and investigation into how the brain and body respond and heal from trauma.
Ironically, the stories we tell ourselves about events and our part in them can increase our body’s adverse responses. Because we tell ourselves and each other to “just get over it” or “pull yourself up by your bootstraps”, to “be a man”, or “don’t be a sissy”, the implied negative judgments make things much more complicated. By increasing our own anxiety about our inability to cope, we add to the burden of neurological arousal. All of us are affected by the large number of stressful situations and images we encounter every day. The undischarged stress builds up in the brain and body, especially if complicated by any prior severe traumatic experience, and the resulting symptoms can get frozen in our bodies and minds. We might not have full-blown PTSD. We think we “should” be able to will ourselves to get over these things. Other people do, don’t they? Well, yes, some do. And many need the help of a professional who has been trained to assist others to discharge the toxic effects of trauma from the body and thus the mind.
Depending on our personal past, witnessing this event disturbed us to different degrees, but no one remained untouched emotionally. This was a dramatic example of how a traumatic event affects peoples’ lives, from close up and from far away. There are so many of these events portrayed on daily news that, in many ways, our nervous systems are constantly in a highly aroused state.
A traumatic event creates a biological sequence in all animals originating in the most primitive aspect of the nervous system in humans that many are familiar with: the fight, flight, or freeze response. In less than an instant, when danger is perceived, the body prepares to engage the danger in a either a fight for life or a flight from peril. All of this is beyond the control of the rational mind because if the body had to count on thinking, it might die. In this area, the body is much more intelligent than the highly valued neo-cortex, the rational, executive part of the brain!
In his book, Waking the Tiger (1997, California, North Atlantic Books) Peter Levine PhD states: “… the intense, frozen energy, instead of discharging, gets bound up with the overwhelming, highly activated, emotional states of terror, rage, and helplessness” (p. 100). All of this frozen material results in a variety of uncomfortable symptoms and behaviors that often change over time, sometimes resulting in medical conditions. This is a trauma response. There is presently a great deal of research and investigation into how the brain and body respond and heal from trauma.
Ironically, the stories we tell ourselves about events and our part in them can increase our body’s adverse responses. Because we tell ourselves and each other to “just get over it” or “pull yourself up by your bootstraps”, to “be a man”, or “don’t be a sissy”, the implied negative judgments make things much more complicated. By increasing our own anxiety about our inability to cope, we add to the burden of neurological arousal. All of us are affected by the large number of stressful situations and images we encounter every day. The undischarged stress builds up in the brain and body, especially if complicated by any prior severe traumatic experience, and the resulting symptoms can get frozen in our bodies and minds. We might not have full-blown PTSD. We think we “should” be able to will ourselves to get over these things. Other people do, don’t they? Well, yes, some do. And many need the help of a professional who has been trained to assist others to discharge the toxic effects of trauma from the body and thus the mind.
Copyright Alice Clark
Copyright Alice Clark
5 Tips that can change
your life:
- Get better acquainted with your strengths and inherent wellness.
- Learn new coping skills,
- Decrease reactivity to triggers.
- With the help of a skilled professional, release the deep layers of trauma that are stuck in your brain and body so they don't control your life.
"I get what you're saying, but..."
"I've tried psychotherapy before. Talking doesn't help."
There is a point at which, no matter how comforting it may be to talk to a non-judgmental person, the problems don’t completely go away. Then it’s time to work with someone who can help you discharge the energy in your system so you aren’t constantly reacting to the past. I use the tools of EMDR, Brainspotting, and Hypnotherapy to facilitate this release.
"There must be something especially wrong with me because I can't get better."
The sense of being broken or damaged beyond repair is something traumatized individuals often report. This negative belief about oneself is often the result of unsuccessful resolution of the guilt and shame in the wake of trauma. Rather than assuming the worst about oneself, it might be possible that the most effective tools have not been tried. After all, what results can be expected when using an embroidery needle to do the job of a hammer?
"I may still need to just talk sometimes. Will I be able to do that with you?"
You are in charge. Therapy is only effective as it meets your needs. No matter what kind of psychotherapy you engage in, the relationship and thus the communication between you and your therapist are most significant. I offer you my skills in applying the appropriate tools at the right moments in ways that work for your healing, and I cannot do that without deep conversations between us.